I Ran Away

Last Friday morning (a week ago) I recieved a message that my Aunt who has been battling cancer for over two years was not doing well. So that day I decided to accompany my Uncle on the 10 hour drive to go visit her.  It was hard to see her so frail but good to know she lived a full life.  We were there for a little over a day and spent time with my family and some extended family.  Aunt Connie passed away Sunday night and the service was this week.

The two days I spent away from my children made me feel like I had run away.  I had to get a sitter for the kids when I left and it was hard to leave them.  (I always feel better when they are with their dad.)  As we were heading out I thought back and realized that I've only been away from my children over night once before and it was when my oldest was 6 weeks old.  At this point the guilt subsided and it just felt wierd to be leaving.  The 10 hour drive passed quickly and at 2 AM we were there and not having had my wind down time with the kids and quiet time with my hubby I had a hard time going to sleep. 

The next morning I was wide awake at 7:00, that's usually when the kids come in to wake me up.  I lay there in bed listening for the little voices that I knew woudn't come.  Instead I got up and had a good visit with my Mom.  The day was spent making visits and dropping stuff off and by evening I'd almost forgotten to worry about my kids.  We sat down to play a game and I remembered I was supposed to call the kids at bed time.  They were already in bed when I called and I was a little sad to not hear their little voices.

I talked to them on the phone the next day and have to appologize to everyone I'ver ever let them call on the phone as they are really hard to understand.  We got back late and it felt good to be home.  My little one stayed pretty close to me for the next few days and even my four-year-old was more affectionate than usual.  It's been interesting visiting with my husband about the things that happened while I was away.  I think I missed him the most, he's the one I can always talk to.  In the end it was a good

I didn't see my boys again until Monday morning when they came in to wake me up.  The little one stayed pretty close to me for the next couple days and even my four-year-old seemed more affectionate than normal.  I missed my husband the most.  He's always been my rock and he was even when I was away.  The kids even had a touch of the flu and he handled it wonderfully.  So, it was really good for me to step away from my daily routine for a couple days.  It has made the daily routine seem a little less mundane and I'm glad to be back.  Maybe I'll run away again, I'll be due for it in another four years. :)